It’s about this time each year that I stay up at night, pacing, talking to myself about what just happened and unable to sleep, unable to go to bed without knowing–how will my story end?!

And every year I surprise myself.

My first year doing NaNo (this was in 2006, when I had no life and showed off this fact by writing 160,000 words in one month–a cumulative count of four inter-related stories), I ended my story story by–oh, no! spoiler alert!–showing that two of my main characters had been dead the whole time, a third was simply insane, and the other was actually the sun. And no, that’s not a typo. His mother was the moon. He just hadn’t known that then.

In NaNo two (in oh-seven), I ended with an anticlimactic confrontation after a dramatic revival of a dead character using the title-theme of my story–a spellbinding ritual of blood, water, and wine. Then vampires came. Cue the scary music…but leave out the scary. Epic fail, but I was in a rush, what can I say? And the twist? They all lived happily ever after.

In my third attempt at writing a fifty-thousand word novel in one month, I once more doubled it up and concluded my tale by ending precariously on the brink of war, but holding off the battle due to my innate lack of being able to write good battle scenes. I’d like to think I’ve improved in the last two years, but I’m not really certain. In any case, the Wolves and the Angels (completely unrelated to this year’s angels, as those in ’08 were angels born of genetic mutations implanted into the human race by a mad scientist-slash-lunatic crazed religious fanatic thousands of years before the story even started, seeding a caste system that ended in the Gothic stylings of the story’s main city, a place called Eden). Where was I again? Oh, yes, it all ended on a pensive note of plausible peace, with the birth of a young girl named Belinda. But that’s another story.

And that’s exactly how I ended it, too.

So last year, I didn’t write a novel. I wrote a collection of short stories I hope to someday polish up and publish in a single volume. So it’s close enough to novel-like, I suppose. In any case, I ended the series of stories with a tale of two lovers, a final end-game to the sequence, a personal proclamation of singular significance. And I totally rocked with my alliteration right there. Go me!

And then there’s this year. I ended writing exactly 79,525 words today (by which I mean Monday), but I just missed the midnight deadline to get it to show up on the NaNo site. That’s alright. It’s still a cool number, one I’m very proud of. And it’s a definite guarantee that I’ll reach my goal this year of eighty-thousand words, a perfectly publishable size for a first-time to-be-published novelist like myself. However, will my story end in time? I haven’t a clue.

Once again, I’ve got that “oh no” feeling, and I’ve already spent almost half an hour pacing with all that’s gone on. I’ve killed over thirty characters in the past two days, and albeit, most of them were faceless, but two of them had names and a third actually was a pivotal character in the story for some time being, while a fourth had some screen time but was a traitor in the end. And I know, before this story ends, I will kill at least one more character the readers will hopefully have come to love by the time she dies, as well as at least one more named character, if not a few. We’ll see how things go.

But, oh, how Nesiya sums it up perfectly! I’ve already drafted her words, though when she’ll say them, I’m not entirely certain. But when she gets around to it, she’ll say this: “All of Heaven is falling, and all of Hell is rising up. What has the world become?”

And it’s true. Think a battle on the scale of the Lord of the Rings (all alluded to off-screen, because like I said, I can’t do battle scenes well, and although I’ve gotten better with one-on-one action, large-scale wars still scare me), and elsewhere, heaven is hailing down like on Sodom and Gomorrah–and I even say it just like that in the book!

It’s all pretty chaotic at the moment, thankyouverymuch.

So where will it end? I’ve gotten that written, too. It all began with the Prelude– “She burned in bright fire / Blue and white shining through her / A beacon to all” –and then at 40,000 words I added an interlude–what are you, foolish? I’m not gonna share that here!–and now I’ve got the last bit of the story told. The extralude. What comes after everything else. It’s another five, seven, five syllables of unparalleled perfection, in my humblest opinion, and it’s the perfect cap to this year’s story.

Now I only need to write its ending.

I’ve got a nagging suspicion I’ll get to 82,000 before the story comes to an end. I’ve got a few scenes stuck in my head of what’s going to happen–death of a dominion, angel annihilation, and lovers united–but all the pieces, the pieces befuddle me and confound me.

I really don’t know what’s going to happen.

But trust me, it’s all going to happen by the stroke of midnight on November 30, 2010. You can mark my words, my story will end tonight. And you can take my word, too, this has been my favorite NaNo of all five and the one I’m most confident in seeing published any time soon. Have no doubts, though, that whether it’s this story or the next, someday I will turn the page from nobody to novelist, and then, then I shall rule the world!


Or at least have a feast and be really happy. We’ll see how it goes.


5 thoughts on “NaNoh-no!

  1. Well, with the recent concrete experimenting with age prevention and reversal (on rodents), I sure would think that, at some point, you will rule the world. Pinky and the Brain at least have a few more days to do so, now.

    I didn’t read Tolkien (yet) (In English), so I have no clue on how proze of war would actually look, but as far as I know it’s usually left out for the politics behind it, or the strategies, assorted events, etc. nigh ad infinitum.

    So then, if I look at the movies, I do reckon most of the dialogue therein was written down, and if that’s any indication the war scenes shouldn’t be all that spectacular anyway. I myself don’t like battle proze, then again, I hardly like any descriptive proze. Which is why I like Asimov. So. There.

    I have no yet commented on the Rheve because, regretfully, I have not yet read part three! I’ve been busy with so many things (read: the different stages of sleep and game addiction — to a singleplayer game, no less. One day I WILL force you to play Dragon Age and Mass Effect (2). It’s a divine imperative, you could say.) that I have not yet gotten around to it. Rest assured, after my 4th play-through (that will also be my final playthrough for the storyline itself, as all of the extra game-content is released now — you carry over savegames to continue the story in the next games, you see, making it of vital importance that the Salarian Doctor does NOT die this time. Of such vital importance that I do not consider this rambling.), or later today, I will have enough time to regret the maniac from not winning in the end. Damn you Levoir, damn you to heaven. (Since that fell down, no?)

    Commas, commas, commas, commas.

    And finally (the “finally” *before* I will make an obligatory second post) your vampire story could not have been more anti-climactic than that of Stephany Meyers (as in, it’s impossible that it had less of a climax). Regardless of whether you’ve read Twilight, we can all recognize it’s the worst piece of literary sacrilege to ever have been formally published.

    … That includes you, Eragon.

    So yeah, congratulations on your victory (in spite of all), and congratulations on my victory (that isn’t really an accomplishment, as I had 720 hours to actually complete it).

    The “finally” was used in the wrong paragraph. That is all.

  2. On many of your points, I’m much obliged to agree completely, although perhaps not so about the order of the world’s worst books, which in effect for kindness, I will not allude to any further in public.

    As far as Twilight, I’ve read the whole tale, but my vampire novel was of no comparison: My vampires were a small piece of the puzzle, and they were truly monsters. Flesh-eating, venomous monsters. As far from sparkly-in-sunlight as possible, I suppose.

    There is just one thing that confused me, so now I shall quote: “Damn you Levoir, damn you to heaven. (Since that fell down, no?)” :and then kindly ask you to elaborate what you intended to mean. (:

  3. I was referring to her succeeding in sealing the deities, meaning the ending was a happy one (I don’t like happy endings — hence the “just in time to regret […]”). So I wanted to damn her, but alas, hell rose in Beacon. So instead, I opted to damn her elsewhere.

    Not agreeing with me? What’s this? Oh, the order of books. Well, I don’t really place Eragon and Twilight in any order, I simply feel they are both very lacking in quality. I haven’t read all books, so it’d be hard to know where they place, but out of the books I’ve read, Twilight (the original) was the worst on every level.

    I’m not sure if there are worse books, but if so I don’t know them. So you may need to shoot me an e-mail and tell me what books actually place lower. ;)

    Count Orlock vampires are the best vampires. It’s also how they are described in Eastern European mythology, rather than the succubus-esque and then aristocratic vampires that we identify as vampires.

    Which reminds me of a grave error in a Twilight satire song: Dracula did NOT die or ignite in sunlight. He was just weaker. (Thank you, Wikipedia.) Most other vampires do, though.

    On the charity you’re collecting for: I can’t donate in any way to that site, but I’ll make up for it by donating to the allied Dutch foundation against HIV and AIDS.

    … As long as they don’t say “Hiv” in their commercials. Or, worse yet: HIV Virus. >.> Don’t you just hate it when people do that?

    So you’ve read Twilight? Then you at least know what I mean. Toughest vampire (or being) ever, could rip someone (even other vampires) apart without so much as an effort. Then he catches Bella, DOESN’T eat her (for a non-existent reason), and then the epic climax: she goes unconscious and the fiend is dead when she wakes up.

    Way to write a climax, Meyers. A critic affectionately called it a non-ending to a non-plot, which I reckon is quite accurate.

    So yeah, I dare you to present to me a more anti-climactic climax. :)

  4. In my anti-climactic climax, two parties at war with each other finally met over dead bodies and sacrificial zombies (strike that, reverse it: over dead zombies and sacrificial bodies) and then–Dun dun DUNNNN–everybody lived happily ever after.

    Even Twilight didn’t anti-climax so poorly as that.

  5. quite so poorly, as poorly as*

    Well, at least you had dead zombies and sacrificial bodies. Twilight was just: boss fight. Then it turned out the boss was Queen Gohma, and we even missed the Deku Nuts being throwed. :(

    I will now read your conclusion to the Rheve.

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